Resilience is a virtue that enables people to overcome difficulties and become better. No one can avoid pain, fear, and suffering. But if you have the virtue of resilience, out of pain comes wisdom, out of fear – courage, out of suffering – strength. So let's look at tips for building and nurturing resilience to be ready for life's surprises.
Learn to be strong and build resilience
Develop the ability to deal with your feelings because that's what people who want to become strong and resilient do at first. Accept stressful changes, understand why they happened, and critically assess your difficulties and vulnerabilities. Do not be afraid to delve into such issues as shame, emotional suffering, blame, and forgiveness.
Lead your revolution on the path to a strong personality. The revolution is the opposite of slow change because it creates a foundation for radical changes in your way of life, leadership, child-rearing, and involvement in civic activities.
Focus on the positive
Concentrate on the good things in life to feel better and deal with challenging situations. For example, spend time with loved ones, try volunteering at a shelter, or do good deeds you enjoy. This positive experience will give you a sense of connection to the world and fulfillment of hope. Pleasant activities improve and maintain your emotional resilience.
Analyze your emotions and cope with them to stay mentally healthy. Your life can become cluttered and stressful if you constantly stuff things into a closet without taking anything out. Similarly, if you ignore your feelings, they may accumulate and cause stress. The Option B summary will provide you with advice on analyzing emotions and learning to solve problems.
Worry only about what you can control
Be confident and use your inner strength to turn problems into opportunities. Your will allows you to recognize and transform what you can control and let go of what is beyond your control. The Stoics of ancient Athens and Rome developed this philosophical perspective. They believed that external factors, such as other people's actions, the inevitability of death, and natural phenomena, are beyond human control.
On the other hand, they emphasized that internal factors, such as decisions, emotions, reactions, attitudes, and judgments, can be subject to the will. Direct your will to change what you can control, namely internal obstacles. Learn more about their philosophy in The Obstacle Is the Way summary.
Assess your emotions
Acknowledge what you feel. This step often seems easier than it is because people tend to ignore the fact that they have emotions. For example, you may ignore feelings of disappointment or anger and try to block them, distracting yourself or reasoning. But, as a rule, this has no effect because completely suppressing negative emotions is almost impossible.
Allow yourself to feel the world, such as being excited, happy, or foolish. Ask yourself a few questions to understand your emotions and their cause. For example, what is the cause of your anger at the moment? What bothers you? How long have you felt happy? Remember that curiosity can help resilient people to solve problems.
Think realistically
Assess your abilities realistically to avoid hindering growth. Being resilient is not about maintaining an image in society. It's about separating dreams from facts. Moreover, an accurate assessment of your capabilities increases your resilience and effectiveness over time.
Aligning your expectations with reality is not always easy, yet it is crucial for success. For example, accept the fact that learning a new language can take years. It may not immediately encourage you, however, when expectations match reality, you are more likely to succeed. Honesty with yourself motivates you to move toward your goal. To find out more read our Do Hard Things summary.
Listen to your inner voice
By recognizing and managing your emotions, you can change your emotional reactions and improve self-resilience. A good way to learn it is through internal monologue. Internal monologue is the voice inside a person that can either undermine confidence or push toward unwise decisions. Listen to it, but with caution.
Your inner voice offers invaluable advice and warnings, although sometimes it can lead you astray. Try to listen to it and learn the different insights it offers. By listening, you ensure you hear the voice at the right time.
Evaluate the situation before reacting
Short mindfulness training can teach you to deal with emotional difficulties. It's not about achieving emotional management perfection. Remember that even the calmest people face the desire to capitulate in difficult times.
One recommendation is to take a pause between stimulus and reaction. For a short period, you can reflect on the problem, as if a chess player thinks before making a move. Such an instant pause before reacting to emotional discomfort can be crucial. This way, you gain control over your reactions, not over stimuli.
Don't fear pain and problems
Numerous studies have shown that the brain cannot distinguish physical pain from psychological pain. For example, the brain can perceive a breakup with a loved one as painful as a severe blow to the face. However, every problem and suffering provides an opportunity to learn something new and do something better in the future. That's why focus not on avoiding problems but on solving them as effectively as possible.
Like most people, you seek happiness. The thing is, happiness is impossible without pain. To have a fit body, you must exercise, and to have strong relationships, you must endure arguments. You will become happy if you learn to solve problems, and how to do it right you can find in The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck summary.
Prioritize what matters and take action
Death is the only thing in this world that will inevitably happen to everyone. When you avoid thinking about death, you also avoid answering important questions like, is it worth your time and energy? Is it worth risking? When you think about the fact that one day you won't be in this world, most worries lose their meaning.
In the last minutes of life, you may regret spending so much time with someone who made you unhappy or working at a job you hated. Don't be afraid to take action and change so that in the last minutes of life you feel happy and grateful for the opportunity to be part of this world.
Being resilient means accepting your emotions, pursuing goals, and overcoming obstacles. You have enough strength to become stronger and change your life. Don't fear problems; everyone faces them, and you can overcome them. The main thing is to believe in your abilities, be patient, and start acting. Life is too short to hide. Don't waste it.
Credentials:
