Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing
5.0
10 min

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing

by Matthew Perry

Brief Summary

“Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing” is an unforgettable story of Matthew Perry's life and experiences. This honest, moving, and heartbreaking book sheds light on the details of family, friendship, work, relationships, and addiction in Matthew's life. It also explains how anyone can pull themselves together and overcome addiction.

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Key idea 1 of 6

Matthew Perry's story begins on a Tuesday night in 1969. From the moment he was born, he cried uncontrollably, much to the frustration of his parents, a beauty queen and a folk singer. Desperate to help their child, they took him to a doctor, who prescribed phenobarbital when he was just two months old. The medication worked, but it set a dangerous precedent for Matthew: relying on pills instead of learning to cope with his problems internally.

His parents split up when Matthew was less than a year old. His father left him alone with his mother, who was 21 then, and went to California to pursue his dream of becoming an actor. His mother worked as the press secretary to Pierre Trudeau, the Prime Minister of Canada. No surprise she was often busy, leaving Matthew neglected and desperate for attention. The birth of another child and the feeling of being a family’s outsider caused behavioral problems for Matthew. He smoked and got into physical conflicts at school, including the well-known incident of hitting Justin Trudeau, the son of his mother's boss and the future Prime Minister.

At 14 years old, Matthew had a life-changing experience. He and his buddies Brian and Chris Murray decided to break into some booze and grabbed a few bottles of beer and a bottle of wine. They managed to finish all the drinks in 15 minutes in the backyard of Matthew's home.

Predictably, Brian and Chris couldn't handle the alcohol and puked their guts out. But Matthew? Something shifted inside him. Lying on the grass, gazing at the sky, he experienced pure joy for the very first time. Suddenly, everything took on newfound meaning, and all his worries disappeared. This fleeting moment was enough to set him on a journey in pursuit of that euphoria through alcohol and drugs.

As time went on, his addiction became a dominant force in his life. What’s even worse, Perry has a condition called anhedonia, which means he can only experience pleasure in thrilling activities or under the influence. This made it even more difficult for him to break free from addiction.

But it wasn't all doom and gloom for Matthew. Feeling estranged in Canada and yearning to meet his father, 15-year-old Matthew decided to go to Los Angeles. He wanted to see if Hollywood could fill his inner emptiness and give him a sense of belonging. This bold move led him to the career that would make him a household name.

01
The man's troubled journey began with the turbulent early years of his life
02
Matthew's pursuit of becoming famous takes place in Los Angeles
03
Onscreen chemistry and an incident leading to further addictions
04
Matthew’s feeling of emptiness after the end of the sitcom
05
Lifelong battle with addictions and newfound happiness
06
Final summary

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