Have you ever heard about the networking jerks? Maybe the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear this term is an ambitious man with an insincere smile who talks to everybody, giving them his business cards. Well, you’re right. The main thing you should know about the networking jerks is that they have no clue about how to build strong relationships.

Cultivating professional and personal relationships is an essential skill for achieving success. Let’s take politicians as an example. Would so many people vote for those leaders if they didn’t create a sense of trust? Or can you imagine a company’s CEO who doesn’t have the support of the employees and doesn’t create a friendly and inspiring atmosphere in a team? Probably, no.

Why do “bad guys” who can’t build relationships can’t go far in today’s world? First, we now have an “abundance of choice” everywhere, including business. This means nobody will choose a guy as the new boss if they don’t respect and trust him. There are always far better options.

The second reason is the so-called “new telegraph.” When a product is bad, keeping it a secret from others is almost impossible. Sooner or later, everyone will realize that this product is not worth buying. It also works with people. You can’t pretend to be nice to people who can help you achieve your goals while being mean to those you consider “useless.” As a consequence, there is a great chance that nobody will work with you at all.

So, how can we build deep connections with others and not become a networking jerk? Firstly, make sure you have something useful to share. Imagine getting an email like, "Hi! I heard you're a good speaker. Let's have tea and talk." After reading this, you might wonder why you should meet this person. What can they offer you that's valuable?

Secondly, don’t gossip. Of course, it can be an easy way to hold a conversation, but it doesn’t work in the long run. By spreading rumors about others, you position yourself as an untrustworthy person.